An option.

To be able to read a blog from back to forward, rather than most current to least current. For instance, I've got the 'Dear Restaurant Employee' section of my blog that I link to on my website that needs to be read from the bottom up. I want it so it can be read from the bottom up.

itunes shuffle

a way to shuffle between all the shared playlists. that would be a true shuffle. also, in the event someone takes their music off the shared list you have others to fall back on.

Live Comedy Radio Station

For when I'm having stand-up/improv comedy withdrawal.

Netflix partnering with imdb.

They're both great sites on their own, but I'm still going to imdb first to look at movies. All I want is an 'Add to your Netflix queue' button somewhere.

Movies on trains.

Movies to rent on the train. It's a captive audience.

Big fan of kiosks right here.

I'm making an assumption that the vast majority of people who pass through Total Wine aren't connoisseurs, and so lack a wine-memory for shit they've tried in the past. There should be a a a a a a kiosk! that you can tell what wines you've tried previously (because you've been given some sort of, I don't know, Total Wine card that tracks your buys) and you've been able to go online piss-drunk to rate your wine choice. Now you can go back to Total Wine and a) get the wine you bought whose name you can't recall and b) see other wines like the wine you liked so if you want to stay in the same ballpark, well, there you are.


Whatever outbrain's done with the ratings system now, I agree, sucks.

Drinkholders

on bus/plane/train/etc. I am unclear why this doesn't exist.

Texting three-way.

Like a group chat for texting.

Pocketbooks

with special lining so you can steal food from the buffet.

A "See 'n' Say"

For obscure/exotic animals, like the okapi, or narwhal.

Medical Miracle

Some kind of serum you can inject into the pituitary gland (thats the one that controls sweating, right?) that makes your sweat smell different--maybe changes the chemical makeup thus creating a more pleasant smell.

IMDB for Brands

So I can see what advertising has been done for a brand over its entire life. Also would be helpful to know WHO did what ads.

IMDB for ads

An online database that lists and cross-references actors from commercials. Then I could figure out how many spots that Asian dude from the current AT&T commercials has been in.

A button

in your car that bookmarks songs you hear on satellite (or perhaps old school) radio so you can download them later.

pressure sensitive brake lights

The harder you hit, the brighter they get.

Guy on street

who offers to smell your breath for you. Partnership with some mint company, I don't know.

Thesaurasaurus

A program that translates text from everyday language to dialects of the past. You could use it to email a friend in Shakespearean English. Or film noire. And of course, cave man.

Wish I'd thought of it

Please ignore the added "journalistic flare."

Make it portable

Heated towel racks that you can put next to your pool or install at community pools to eliminate the blue-lip syndrome of small children everywhere.

Dimensionalize Measurements!

You know how we have those measurement/currency websites? It doesn't do me any good. What is five pounds? What is 24 Hong Kong dollars? There should be a website that converts abstract measurements into something more tangible to understand.

So I'd type in 6.2 pounds. Then it'd tell me that's the equivalent of carrying a small, retarded puppy.

For fake-bakers

UV-protective contact lenses so you don't have to wear those weird little goggles that give you the reverse-raccoon look.

Big Bowl of Pickles:

The Movie

Eyedropper in Word.

So that when something comes in as a different font, size, color, etc., you can just eyedrop it to be similar to the rest of the text.

Big Bowl of Pickles: The Restaurant

I've eaten at my fair share of sandwich shops over the years, but I have never received a big bowl of pickles like the one I got when I ate lunch at the Rye Ridge Deli. Is it customary for delis to give you a bowl of pickles before your meal? I've never seen it before.

If that is their "thing" they should make a bigger deal of it. Rename the restaurant Big Bowl of Pickles. The locals would call it "Pickles." The local kids, however, would simply call it "Picks."

Cartoons!

One of the things you're bound to talk about with friends is the cartoons you used to watch as a kid. Not sure what it is, but everyone has stories about their childhood cartoons, and still love to find them on TV. I want a channel that is devoted to just playing the original Doug, Rug Rats, X-Men, Thundercats, Transformers, etc.  Like Nick-at-Nite, but instead of old sitcoms, old cartoons.

Online yearbook archive

You know how on issuu you can view magazines and other documents online? Well this would be the same thing except it would only have yearbooks. You can search by location, school, year, etc. Most importantly, you would be able to bookmark your favorite headshots.

time zones for postings

it would be nice if every person contributing to a particular blog could choose the preference of their time zone. then when their posting comes up it would say 5:40 pst or 2:30 est instead of all coming from the same time zone even if all the posters aren't in that time zone. that would make for a more accurate blog. 

pantone moleskine

each page would be a new pantone color. the colors would be in order. that way you can have a color picker with you wherever you go. also, it would be pretty.

magazines

where every page is perforated for your connivence. 

a sense of humor

for eb, post haste. 

a thing

on the side of eb like batteries to test whether or not he will approve of an idea for this blog. that way you won't waste your time writing ideas you think are good but eb deems as zero star ideas.

Markers

that have things on the side of them like batteries do to test how much juice they've got left in 'em. That way you wouldn't have to open, test, and close an entire box of markers just to see if they're worth keeping.

Airport.

I'm trying to get a ticket here and, for me, there's three possible places I can fly into but I can only check them one at a time. I want it so that on Priceline or equivocal that I can type all three in as possible destinations so I can see all at once what the cheapies is.

Email notifier

A way to see what someone's reaction/expression is when they read an email you've sent. And maybe how long they spent reading it and how many times they may have gone back to it later.

An uber-informative city website

where people can post "reviews" on different neighborhoods in cities and describe them for people visiting or moving. They could also do reviews for apartments and landlords and whatnot--I know there's a kind of shit list of landlords website, but this would be more inclusive. Try this restaurant, don't go below Geary Street, etc. 

Maybe I wouldn't have tried to get an apartment in the Tendernob if this existed. 

Anyone could post and it'd be like an all-inclusive introduction to new cities.

An advertising wikipedia.

Maybe these already exist on those sites you have to pay for or sign up for or I already have access to I just don't remember what Adcenter's passwords are, but it'd be nice to have a detailed history of every campaign for a product and who did what and where and when and how and whosits and whatsits.

Facebook.

On Facebook, you should be able to organize your friends. So, for instance, when you search for your friends, you can tag them as undergrad or graduate school or work friends, even if they haven't labelled themselves as belonging to any of those institutions. For your records only, so they wouldn't have to request confirmation. I think they sort of do this, I'm just making it complicated.

Another Prediction

People are going to start referring to Obama and Biden as 'Joe-bama' and McCain and Palin as 'McPalin.'

Red pens.

There should be a red pen option in word files, texts, documents, etc. where you can go back in and make quick additions or comments without having to highlight them all and changing the color to red. You can also look at the document with all the red pen marks left out.

Dictionaries.

Dictionary sites should have a 'favorite' option so you can add all the words you like or come across into a list so you'll aaaalways remember them. And you can, uh, look at other people's lists if they have similar favorite words. Anyway, bye!

Adult Mangers

sleep like a baby jesus.

Sensor of humor

A way to tell by looking at someone whether they have a sense of humor and what kind (poop jokes, political, sarcasm, etc) so you know whether the hilarious story you're about to tell is going to go over like gangbusters or leave them shocked and/or disappointed.

So I'm freelancing.

And I'm writing my ideas in a text file. And they've got headers, and then sub-ideas. And you know how on some Flash or Java sites, you can click the arrow beside a header, and it opens and closes the sub-headers? I want to be able to do this with my text file, so that I can look at my big ideas at once, and then open them individually to add my sub ideas.

mochadog

chocolate covered hotdogs. de-licious. 

.25 cups.

If people want their customers to care more about the environment or whatever that shit is, they should charge them for paper cups. If you bring in your own cup, you're cool, but they should visibly and audibly announce that if they use a paper cup, it's going to cost them, say, an extra quarter. One, more people will bring in cups and two, the money they get for paper cups can go to some environmental mumbojumbo. I would of course boycott anyone who made me pay for a cup but someone might respond to this. Inspired by Slate.

A drag queen name

Mrs. Hippy - a southern bell with legs from ya-ya to ga-ga.

A prequel

to 28 Days Later and 28 Weeks Later:

28 Days Earlier- A Romantic Comedy

Club Sandwich

A nightclub with a full bar, live bands and DJ's, and DELICIOUS SANDWICHES.

obscene message in a bottle

Bottles to be strategically placed along the most picturesque beach shores of the world. Messages to be obscene, hateful and/or generally poke fun at the reader for being a sentimental fool.

A post ratings thing.

I would like to add a post ratings thing to the blog so that we can rate each other's ideas, but that shit seems to be not existing. So that.

Fueled by Fat

I had an idea a while ago for gyms that create usable energy by the members. Turns out these actually exist, but I'll do it one better:

Make the gyms free, and have the members pledge to work out a certain amount, hence create a certain amount of energy. If they don't reach their monthly quota, they pay a typical membership fee. It gives people the incentive to work out beyond wanting to be environmentally-responsible, especially because that desire hardly outweighs the desire to finish the work day and not move til the next one begins.

If necessary, these gyms could align themselves with local businesses that would benefit from the generated energy (and the positive PR) and help sponsor the gyms.

Switch Pitchers

You know how in baseball there are switcher hitters who can hit from both sides of the plate? Why aren't there pitchers who can pitch with both arms? If one arm gets tired, they can just use the other.

I want to do a skit

where a guy picks his nose and doesn't have anywhere to put his booger so he puts it back in his nose.

Harold and Kumar

Buy A Wii.

a clothing store for expecting mothers called

bumble bean

alphabetical order

an option in word to highlight the list you just made make in word go in alphabetical order. i would like it very much if this already exists and i just don't know about it. 

Pre-pay at the pump.

When you pre-pay with cash, the attendant makes it so that your gas can't possibly go past the money you gave them. If you gave them $30, when you're pumping your gas, the gas stops pumping at $30. This is nice, except you can't do the same thing with credit cards. It's more a pay-as-you-go with credit cards. It'd be nice if you could swipe your card, enter in the amount of gas you want, and pay less attention to trying to not cross the .00 boundary so you don't have to pull out your copper.

a bookmark profile website

a place online where you can upload all of your favorite website and blog addresses. then the website displays the sites in a way that you can see the home page updated to that minute. that way when you are going to all of your favorite blogs and websites you only need to go to one site to see which ones have updated. that way you don't waste your time making new tabs of blogs/sites that might not have updated materials.

or a feature that you could have on your bookmarks that would show you a thumbnail of website to see if you needed to go to it or not. 

like thesuperficial.com

but instead of celebrity news it would be real news. 

**clarification for eb** this site would be a blog that makes me laugh about things happening in the news. also the superficial headlines are much funnier than those on cnn.com or any other new site i've seen and i would like that for real news in addition to celebrity gossip.

a purse compartment-

made specially for sunglasses. so they won't break in 1,000 pieces ever!

Speaking of Passwords,

Wouldn't it be nice if all things worked like this blog, where when you're signed into your email/gmail, it knows, and that serves as your password, rather than having to remember eight hundred passwords for Amazon and Netflix and Home Again and the like. Think about what usually happens—you click the "I can't remember my password" button, and they email it to you. But if you're already in your email...
Also, to Elmer's point, then you'd have more privacy than having your computer remember passwords for everything.

My Legacy

If I ever get the opportunity to put something into a time capsule for future generations to remember me by, I think I would like to put in something really, really important.

Like my house keys.

Widescreen subtitles.

There is little to no reason why the subtitles on widescreen releases do not appear in that blank black bar across the bottom of the screen rather than losing itself in the picture. This is a reasonable request.

Quick locks.

When other people jump on my computer after me and I still have windows up, I'd like it so that I can lock certain windows into place. So, for example, if I have my G-Mail open all day and my mom comes in, she can't bring that window up without the password. Or if I have a bunch of windows up, period, they can't fuck them up and exit out of them. Does that make sense?

Something That

keeps me from getting in a bunch.

television channel

that is for liars. dedicated to slandering and falsehoods.

Off-white socks

To wear when your white shoes fade faster than your white socks.