Wisconsin's new tag.

Always looking up!

Because it's big sky country!!

And hope.

I've been playing Mario a lot.

I want a Mario game where Bowser switches bodies with Mario, and he goes around destroying Mario's reputation, and Mario is Bowser, trying to save the world. AWESOME.

A type of serial killer.

Hello. If I was a serial killer, the serial killer I would be is this:

I would pick one person at random. I would then follow that person, and kill everyone with an important role in that person's life (wife, boss, lover, friend, family) in such a way as to make it seem like the random person was the last person to see them alive. With no real evidence to speak of other than simple time and place, the first death would be random, the second death might even be coincidence, but by the third death, that is a pattern.

I would rate my success as a serial killer not by how many people I kill, but by how many people I send to prison for my crimes.

THIS IS A NEW AGE.

Also, bow-and-arrows are underused devices.

Where I parked my car last night.

Something that lets you keep tabs on where you parked last night.
Maybe:
- a webservice. Foursquare-like, but not public. Check in when you park.
- a printed thing sent to you of a Google maps image with your apartment in the center, and the six-block radius surrounding it.

I invented a video game!

An idea for a videogame, anyway.

So you know how when you play the big, expansive Mario games? You explore the worlds you don't necessarily have to because you want to get everything, or try everything, because you want to get the most out of your game. You want to check out the secret worlds and get all the coins and jewels and you know.

Meanwhile, there is a fucking *princess* who has been kidnapped and is rotting in a cell. Let's assume they're not taking the best care of her and there are raging lizard hormones. Generally, Mario does not take into consideration that a lack of hustle means more pain for his dearly beloved.

So the natural game-playing technique is to just go after everything. I think. I don't think people just run through it to the end. That's less fun. So as people play THIS game, the one I'm describing, they will be very highly encouraged to do EVERYTHING. Fun mini-games! Go visit the secret world which is only available now! You can't come back later! You have to do it now or it will be gone! Fuck fuck fuck, I have to do this now, I have to go do this, fuck the princess.

So when you've beaten the game, you've gotten everything you need to, you fight the monster, you save the princess! And she is fucking dead. Dead, do you hear me? Your lolly-gagging bullshit killed your fucking princess.

So the only way to 'win' the game in the purest sense is to avoid all the bullshit and go straight for the princess. *MEANING* that by not enjoying the game (to it's full potential) means that you 'win' in the purest sense of the word. However, by enjoying the game to its full potential, you can never win.

To recap: Enjoy game, always lose. Enjoy game less, win.

This is art, people.

Your friendly neighborhood cap-and-trade.

They say cap-and-trade can help poor companies become richer, by selling energy units they don't need to richer, more productive countries. Perhaps the same could be said for a city structure. Wherein: each person and each business in a district gets a certain amount of credits. They cannot use more than that. If they do, they're fined. However, by buying credits from people who use less energy, they can use as much as they want while helping the poor-folk rise up, shorty, ayyyyye. It also serves to help everyone keep a watchful eye over their own energy use, as behavior change is more likely to occur when laws are enacted. When it doesn't become a choice, as it were.

A website that counts to the highest possible number.

See where it's up to today!

An idea for the police.

Hey, police! You should bury subtle siren sounds beneath songs on the radio like in some of those rap songs. That way, you can trick some paranoid bustas that you on they tail when all you doing is playing, dog.

Nerflix.

A service where CGI and AfterEffects experts insert Nerf bullets and Nerf guns over actual bullets and guns. Blood is replaced by green Kool-Aid.

Ben & Jerry's

MLK & Cookies.

Black and white flavors mingling together in my mouth???

Tag line for sex club.

'Don't come early.'

ADVERTISING, MOTHERFUCKERS.

silent slinkys

ones that make no noise when you use them. how magical.

Videochat board games.

When you're chatting with another or two, a little boardgame they can all share in! Yay!

THIS IS REAL LIFE.

Dating sight for single parents.

Playdate.com! Arrange a date with a single mother with a son or daughter of a similar age as yours! Watch as they bond! Or don't watch and fuck. Or something.