Trail Mix With No Raisins

I feel guilty wasting them.

Movie trailers.

In Wal-Mart and I'm sure other stores, you can pass certain CDs under this scanner to listen to select cuts. I would like for them to do this with DVDs. Scan them and then you can watch the dangblast trailer. I would watch the fuck out of this shit.

a food idea

breakfast flavored pizzas. toppings include but are not limited to: potatoes o'brien, cheese, scrambled eggs, sausage, bacon, canadian bacon, onions, and ketchup.

maybe i'd like pizza if it were in this format. maybe you'd like pizza more.

alex and eb, perhaps you could sell the breakfast pizza in school lunch format.

Horror movies based on the collected works of Simon and Garfunkel.

The Sound of Silence. Hello, Darkness...

Bridge Over Troubled Water. When darkness comes, and pain is all around...

Scarborough Fair. Are you going?


This is the least good thing I've ever been a part of.

waterproof newspapers/magazines

So I can read my celebrity gossip in a hot tub without getting arm cramps.

If only I were 18 again...

I went to a concert last night where I had to get a 21+ stamp on my hand.

Technically speaking, I could have brought in a bag of fake (or real), stamped, hands and demanded that I be served one drink per hand.

I wonder if anyone has tried this before.

IPhone rape whistle application

and a pepper spray application for the next time around.

Glow-in-the-dark spiders.

Let's assume Liz's spider GPS is on this side of incredulous, and try a logical, real-world solution to spider population control.

When you spray the bug spray, sometimes they don't die. It would be nice if the bug spray had glow-in-the-dark chemicals in them so that while they're walking around dazed and confused, you can find them again and perform a killing blow.

email copies of your reciepts

instead of wasting paper, it would be great if companies could just send you an email confirmation for your purchases. i know apple does it for their purchases but it would be nice if they did it at grocery stores and other places where you don't really need your receipt unless you were charged for two almond joy's when you only got 1 king sized one.

double decker matches

the top is for unused matches. the bottom for used matches.

an alarm clock

it won't beep or make a bad noise. it will just start telling jokes. that way you wake up smiling.

a yelp for individuals

a website where people can rate other people based on how good of a roommate they were or whether they paid their bills on time. so rental agencies know which people are the best for their buildings.

a half speed button/elevator speedlimit

a half speed button to press on elevators in these modern buildings. they go too fast sometimes so i hit floors i don't want to go to just to slow the elevator down.

ninjabread cookies

see title.